Things are going great with John. I am so lucky to have him in my life. He is my Imzadi.

My Family Christmas is this Sunday. I am taking spinach dip (just the traditional knorr), white chocolate fudge (satsuma zest, white chocolate, condensed milk, toasted almonds, dried cranberries), and broccoli salad. The salad is a hybrid between the one I am used to and the one John is used to. The one I am used to is broccoli, red onions, raisins and bacon bits in a mayo/sugar/apple cider vinegar dressing. The one he is used to is broccoli, cherry tomatoes and shredded cheddar in the same type dressing. I combined the two and left out the raisins. It came out really good.

I am making homemade goodies to give people as well. In addition to the previously mentioned fudge I am hoping to make date balls, double chocolate walnut biscotti, oreo balls, marshmallows, haystacks (butterscotch and chowmein noodles), forgotten cookies, rum balls and pistachio nougat. If the weather cooperates I may make divinity but really I think I am making more than enough sweets hehe.

John is on the road and I am missing him. I know he will be home tomorrow and I am so looking forward to it. I think we are gonna hang out with his family on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. I am not sure. Either way I have both days off so I am game for whatever. I am looking forward to Christmas this year. I can't wait to give John his present. I know he isn't expecting it, but I am equally sure he will really like it. He *better* hehe. I was torn on whether to go for it or not and decided what the heck.

In other news I am getting a tattoo. Jake is going to help me come up with a phoenix design I like and I am getting it on my left upper arm. It is to symbolize my healing and journey toward self acceptance. It is also going to not only cover the scars on my arm, but he is going to come up with a way to use them in the design to add even more depth and meaning.

On the 12th we went to Jake's wife Amy's graduation. It was a rainy day but we had fun. We all ate at Atlas in p-cola. The food was great and extra bonus points for the presentation. It just would have been a good time for me to suddenly love seafood.

Ever since Diva mentioned it on SoThere, I have been following the blog of a brave woman named Lisa who has been fighting cancer. Sadly she is now in the final, final stages. I am hoping for a sense of peace to pass over her and her family. I can’t imagine what they are going through.

I am now on facebook actively.

Infection cleared up and no surgeon. Yay! The scary part is the ER bill I got yesterday for $567.

I am working off and on on my site http://www.healing-within.net. I changed the look a bit and put stuff on the ‘About Me’ section. I have to research resources and then I will actually have a helpful site.

I really hate when people I love and/or care about are going through a lot or are sick and I am far away and feel helpless to do anything. *sigh*

Right now I am really wishing for a good night’s sleep. Last night was semi-better. I actually slept straight through 3 hours, and probably would have longer if Shadow hadn’t decided to get yappy. I got more than 3 hrs sleep, it’s just 3 hrs is the longest I slept at one time.

I’ve been more social in WoW and have made some new friends. It feels good to feel free to talk to people and help people without worry of snippy remarks. I have put in way more hours than I should lately just because it is nice to be able to do whatever I want.

I have been steady losing weight, which makes me very happy. I have added Hydroxycut to the mix just to try to jump start my metabolism a bit. I am not taking the full dose though, staying at the starting dose because I don’t want my blood pressure to rocket up. Being skinny won’t do me a lick of good if I give myself a stroke or heart attack. Phil sent me a bottle to try to see how I did with it.

If I ever manage to find my $50 rebate visa card I am getting my hair cut…short. The place I am going does personal consultations and customizes based on hair type and bone structure. I want something short, low to no maintenance apart from getting it cut, that emphasizes my eyes and doesn’t make me look like a boy. I am thinking pixie cut short.

And So It Goes – Billy Joel

Embedding Disabled…sorry Clicky Here

In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I’ve held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
Its just as well for all I’ve seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you’re the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
That’s if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break

And so it goes, and so it goes
And you’re the only one who knows

WoW-wise I have been doing PvP and helping Dan on his hunter and then Dan with his Priest and Rugal with his Warlock that they play together. Hard to believe they are getting close to being ready for Outlands. I almost have all my marks. I think I need 35 more Alterac and I’ll have the 90 I need. Honorwise I still need like 60 some thousand. But once I get my marks I am just gonna do the battlegrounds I really like. I will admit Alterac is growing on me. I like it when it goes smooth but hate when there’s like 10 afk people on our side. Or all but 2 people on offense or defense.

I am going to get Lumi in a different guild. I love Kamikaze Runners but no one is ever on. I understand they have other stuff going on, I just would like Lumi to be in a guild where I can help people and so if I need another person for an instance it isn’t a matter of “Do you have any tanks/DPS from your guild on we can get to help?” *me checking guild tab* “Uhm no, I am the only one on.” Dan’s main is guildless at the moment so we are gonna find a good one for both of us to join together.

Dan awesomely helped me last night. He helped me work on Argent Dawn rep (such a GRIND) and helped me get the Crusader weapon enchant. I thought it would take forever to get, but it took like 16 minutes with his help.

Other than the stuff I don’t feel like talking about there isn’t much going on. Oh my bike should be here this week. So then I am gonna start biking the 3 miles to work.

I feel like I am constantly on the verge of an anxiety attack and today just has this very surreal feeling like everything is slightly off kilter or out of synch.

OneRepublic is easily becoming one of my favorite groups. Their sound is so varied. Right now their song All Fall Down is on. I love the rhythm of it.

Pieces was my favorite song by Sum 41, but after getting the album I like almost all the songs a lot.

My mood is a little better today. Probably because it is Saturday. Still tired though.

I do love Dove Dark Chocolate. It is so smooth and yummy and has an awesome mouth feel, BUT they kinda messed up on the Tiramisu bit. Not that these taste bad, but it is not Tiramisu. Tiramisu is light and fluffy and tastes of cream, Mascarpone cheese, rum, coffee and chocolate with ladyfingers or sponge cake. These chocolates of course taste of chocolate, and also coffee and almost a buttered rum. They also used caramel instead of a cream filling. So, I like them but they will not stave off a Tiramisu craving.

All Dove Promises have these little sayings on the inside of the wrapper. Since I am having an identity crisis I paid closer attention to these than usual. In the 24 hrs since I bought these I have had 5. In order here are the messages I have gotten:

1. Discover yourself
2. Age is nothing but a number
3. Remember your first everything
4. Do what feels right
5. Go against the grain

Interesting…